My Thoughts

Tossing and turning and trying so hard to sleep - I could hear mom and dad arguing down the hall. I wish they’d stop, because the boys might wake up, and I’m just too tired to get them back to sleep.   Dad is telling mom that she has to stop drinking and using the rent money, and I know she’s crying. Geeze, I’ve heard ‘em all, excuses from behind that damn door. From behind the closed door creeps the sounds of poverty , echoes in my head  I think how great that would be for personification, so I grab my journal to add that note. My pen’s stuck in the crease of a poem.  I wrote this in class today as Ms. Patel droned on and on about the beauty of poetry and the deeper meanings it contains. Ms. Patel, sometimes poetry is just lines with meter and words that may or may not rhyme.   Sometimes a phrase that you may think is a simile or metaphor is just a reflection of the reality of the poet’s existence. These were the introductory remarks I wrote in class....

I understand the true consequences of generational poverty.  I understand that it takes years and sometimes isolation and a lot of rejection, disappointment and self-doubt to move one small inch into change.  I also understand that immediate gratification is easier than having faith in yourself or having faith in something bigger because in generational poverty, trust is a huge issue. I also know and understand what it takes to get intrinsic motivation from those who come from low socioeconomic families.  I have heard all the excuses and not because I am a teacher but because I was a child in that environment and heard all the excuses for my mom, my sisters, my cousins, and my neighbors. I lived the struggle as I watched so many people struggle. The Raitzyns quilt project.........stunning Struggle, not for change and improvement but struggle from one quick fix to the next; that's the cognitive restructuring that has to happen.   It has to be a change in t...