My Thoughts

Jarvis found himself seated at a table with people he didn't know, miscellaneous benefactors or historical society persons. He tried to maintain small talk, but his mind continued to drift a thousand miles away across years to Austin and the vibrant Texas beauty with an intoxicating drawl. Jarvis?" she asked, extending her delicate pale hand to him. "You look just like what Constance said you would," she smiled. As his dark hand took hers, he caught a hint of perfume, the soft silkiness of her skin inviting, and he remembered she had a very firm handshake. "It's so nice to finally meetcha," Deandra said slowly casting her pale blue eyes downward and then angling them up slightly as the slow smile crossed her face. Intellectually, he had been mesmerized during their two week email exchange......her ability to discuss a wide range of topics impressed him. She was a natural storyteller with words, creating interest and making points so effortless...

Gloomy Grey Days In my mind the Carpenter's song "Rainy Days and Mondays" plays as an LMN movie plays on my small archaic tv in the corner of my room. Cool breezes whirl through the house.........sounds of life: the washer, dryer and dishwasher keeping me company. Although it's Thursday, I am flexing time to work on Saturday, so this little bit of alone time re-energizes my spirit. It has been a very long two weeks..............things at work and studying. Add to that the uncertainty of relationships and crazy weather, I could tell I needed some down time.

New Beginnings It is gorgeous outside.............dusk casting shadows over the day, whispers echoing in the stillness of night's anticipation. Sadness today in the passing of a student on our campus, and as we worked the call from our posts as good police communications officers, my heart traveled thousands of miles away to Argentina from where this young man originated. So many prayers to his family and friends who will mourne the loss of so much potential. Love is the most amazing and beautiful light existing in our lives..........love in a child's hug and a reassuring text from a coworker. Around me my life continues oblivious to my saddened heart: dinner preparations in the kitchen and the sounds of hip-hop music from Whitney's room filter into my reverie. I am sooooo ready for something new in my life..........the new love or the new job or maybe even a new body for a change. And even before the words fully materialize in my mind, I remember that a mother grieves toni...

Troubled It has been a very surreal weekend............Kaitlyn turning 15, Melanie finishing moving out and Whitney growing up before my eyes. I spent my Saturday in bed most of the day feeling horrible, probably the result of food poisoning. I have no idea where I am right now in my life or where I am headed. Feeling completely disjointed, depression has set in. Cymbalta commercials play repeatedly on LMN.......Guy calls this channel evil. For a while in my fevered sleeping, I felt an immense sense of guilt for lying in bed. As the time on my alarm clock ticked the day away, I barely remember how events unfolded. At one point, I remembered the big birthday parties the girls used to have complete with tons of family and friends, the cake, icecream and food. I wondered if Kaitlyn remembered them too, worried that she would be so disappointed that I was sick on her 15th b'day. Today, Kaitlyn is in bed sick, and I am moving way too slow. Her red velvet cake with candles sits on...

Sitting in class learning how to integrate more and more technology into my classroom instruction while I text my daughter and check work emails. Something old and nostalgic in me wants an immediate return to older times when just a blank sheet of paper and a pencil were all the technology needed to teach. Working on a lesson plan using the attached Adele video, thought I'd share it so that perhaps I will get a better love appreciation for all this new technology. My assignment with this video includes: paralleling the alive and dead figures; interpret the use of shadows to illustrate truths; and, contribute an authentic and meaningful discussion to the discussion board expanding the title of the song into some other aspect of your life.

~out of sight~ I had this extraordinary dream last night...........I had lost my sight. I guess extraordinary is not the best word for some, but what I took from the dream as I woke this morning was a genuine blessing for my sight. As I blinked the sleep out of my lazy eyes and gazed around my room, I realized I was again competent in my life. Scary the thought of losing my sight.............I became completely dependent on others around me for my daily activities. I could no longer work in my profession nor could I surf the net looking at retro fashions. I did a bit of an experiment as I began my day............I tried doing things with my eyes closed. We take for granted many things in our daily lives...........laundry sorting, cooking, picking out clothes. It took me almost 4 times longer to sort 3 piles of laundry than normal by relying only on touch. Are braile consoles even available on washer/dryer sets? My new smart phone would be obsolete for me.

Much sleep has been lost of late, For in my mind, trouble waits; Formed from fears only I know Threatening always to show........... It has been a very long time since I wrote poetry, and it was the last thing I expected to be doing with all my anger and disappointment. Even though I know disappointment comes from unrealized expectations, I cannot help but feel very upset. There are times when I revel in my pride at being a boat rocker.  I picture myself standing defiant in a raging sea, daring all to conquer me.  Believe me when I say that I have spent as much time in my adult life attempting to conform.  In those moments of attempted conformity, the raging seas envelop me, threatening to consume.   Only when I stand defiant have I weathered the storm. Poetry used to be a favorite of mine.  I would spend hours practicing my technique, working on rhyme schemes and meter.  It's almost impossible for me now, and I wonder if I will ever pick it up agai...

Texas Baptist Children's Home I noticed this beautiful church not long after I moved to Austin. I was working at Sears in Round Rock and had some time to do some sight seeing. The entrance of this classic church angles the intersection, almost beckoning one to come visit. I remarked once how gracious the church seemed and that I could so so so see myself in a wedding gown on the front porch. One of my former co-workers at Sears said she had attended a wedding there once and that it was beautiful. Located on the corner of 79 and North Mays in very close proximity to historic downtown, visiting the church is an experience.

The Holy Cross Coptic Orthodox Church Located on the corner of McNeil Drive and I35 in Round Rock, I pass this church often in my comings and goings. Its simplicist design and location on a minor side street make detection from the rapid travelers on the interstate almost impossible. The first time I really noticed it was two years ago when we parked across I35 to watch the bats exit the overpass. Its actual address is: 700 S IH 35 Round Rock, Texas. Another striking feature are the numerous palm trees lining the frontage road. Doing some research, I discovered that the Coptic Orthodox Church has changed less than any other church. Read all the information on the webpage for the Coptic Orthodox Diocese.

Gethsemane Lutheran Church  For years I have loved this gothic style church with its beautiful blue stained glass windows.  At night it truly is a beautiful sight. The February day I went to snapshot this location, my bestie friend Connie went with me. We walked around the open area of the church among others enjoying the beautiful day.   Bordering the church are Highway 183 and the Austin SPCA. Across the bustle of the roadway, through the pillars of the fly-over is Red Lobster.  Even in the calm of a Sunday afternoon, the world outside the church is audibly noticeable. However, a certain serene atmosphere exists.  Surely, the presence of the Lord is in this place , a beautiful song comes to mind. Imagine my surprise when I saw the name of the church on its billboard.  In my first of 52 weekly profiles of area churches was  the original Gethsemane Lutheran Church which is now the library for the Texas Historic Library. What an amazing coin...

~West Side Story~ It is the quintessential music of West Side Story , the "Prologue Sharks and Jets" that always sends my mind back to 1984 and a debate tournament at Brownwood High School. Even though I had seen the classic 1961 movie several times before that day, something about watching it in the library with others in my peer group made the movie relevant. On the 50th Anniversary of the movie , I am going to watch the Broadway presentation at Bass Concert Hall . For whatever reason, Natalie Wood movies are capturing my attention this week: 1) with Splendor in the Grass and 2) West Side Story.

as found in The Austin Chronicle.......... Snapdragon Brunch Cocktail In a "martini shaker", add: 1/2 cup orange juice, 1/4 cup peach Vodka, 2 Tab. brown sugar and 1 teaspoon vanilla extract. Add 3-4 cubes of ice and shake well. Pour into a brown sugar rimmed martini glass ((or a wine glass)). Add a curl of orange peel or add cocktail cherries with a wedge of orange. I found this recipe in an Austin Chronicle article in 2007. If I can find my recipe, I will scan in and fully give credit .

~ Conviction ~ My 2011 word is conviction and as I drove into work this morning, I listened as K-LOVE and Lisa and Eric sharing stories about the one word so many others had chosen, my own choice came to mind, and I wondered that I had not done much in the first month of 2011 with it.