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Enough

For so long, I've held onto this strange belief that I would meet someone, fall in love and remarry, having a life of support, understanding and compassion. Whew!!

NOT!

It has been one of the hardest things I've ever done to actually have faith in this ideal, and with great reluctance, I finally quit. I finally let go and resolve myself to an adult life of singleness.

I was only 32 when my marriage failed, and I've longed for companionship. I've longed for tender kisses and late summer evenings holding hands watching the sun go down. All the things I thought I would find, I haven't.

Been trying to pray and reestablish a sense of my belonging in the bigger picture. Listening to Christian music and reading the Bible. I want to believe in something so badly. I want to believe that I am ok.

Broken.................I feel very broken.

Comments

  1. stacci151:50 PM

    I am sooo glad that my life has become what I had once envisioned it to be. Finally happy, I feel in touch again with Stacci and not the disjointed pieces of incompleteness.

    ReplyDelete
  2. stacci1511:07 AM

    I wish I could say that 18 years later there was a resolution to this. I wish I could say that what I had envisioned had magically come true even though I knew I was putting it aside. The irony of life is that we sometimes want some thing or we think we want it and what we really want is really in front of us all the time. I love the life I have built for myself here in 2024. It has its ups and downs and I’m trying to figure out exactly where I fit in to the life that I’m living. I have a boyfriend. But there is no discussion of the happily ever after. I just don’t know.

    ReplyDelete

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